Newlywed Pain

(This entry is a finalist in our Good, Bad, and Funny honeymoon story contest.  There are 16 stories, please vote for our winner by adding a comment to your favorite.)

Dear Anniversary Inn,  I just learned of your contest and I have a story that I must share with you! 

My wonderful husband and I were married four years ago.  As we left the church to go get our pictures taken we were sprayed with rice, some rice bags that remained unopened (thanks guys), kisses, hugs and wonderful wishes for a happy marriage.  My husband thought it would be funny to take me in the car offered by one of his five grooms men, a large white four-door Hummer, with all five of his grooms men stuffed inside with me. 

In the confusion of trying to get everyone into the vehicle,  I ended up in the back seat with my huge dress still hanging out a barely opened door.  My husband was trying to stuff the last bite of fabric into the car and once he thought he finally had all of the layers tucked into the car he slammed the door to make it stay there.  Pain ran through my foot and up my leg.  His reaction to the doors opening was to slam it shut again.  Pain cursed at me this time. My newly pedicured big toe was slammed and shut in the HUMMER door twice.  The second time he slammed the door, on instinct, I actually pulled my toe out of the closed door possibly causing more damage.

On the way to get our pictures done I was very aware of the shooting, stabbing, horrible cursing pain and the continuing swelling that was hop-scotching from  my toe to my foot and ankle.  I tried to keep it cool because I didn’t want to hurt my husbands feelings, the poor guy had actually broken the opposite foot the very first time we danced together in college ( I will not say he was completely at fault in that instance…who asks to be flipped when they have no idea how to land?).  The irony of the coincidence was actually easing the pain a little for me, I was having myself a wee-little flood of emotions that was allowing the pain to seem somewhat comical. 

While we took pictures I left my wedding shoes on, during the reception I had to switch to flip flops and eventually to no shoes at all.  My husband  kindly aided me in making all of the right poses for pictures.  He felt so, so bad. He even held me tightly while we danced so there wouldn’t be a  way for me to injure myself further.

Our honeymoon was tricky getting started.  We stayed overnight in Wyoming in order to have breakfast and open presents with family.  We were supposed to leave after presents to go to Wendover where we had reservations for one of their suites with hot tub (later made into an Epsom Salt bath), a couples massages waiting. 

Unfortunately I could barely walk.  My toe was crusty and the nail was dark black and raised through my acrylic pedicure.  It was stuffed-sausage-like and the swelling continued through the ball and top of my foot.  We headed out for the day late with ice packs in tow.  After dropping off a friend at the airport we headed to the hospital emergency room. Clearly I was not a top priority in terms of emergencies.  We waited several hours later to get into a room.  We were exhausted and ended up falling asleep on the ER bed together, not impressing the staff at all.  After X-rays the doctor came in and poked a needle through the top of my toenail, releasing the pressure and spraying the room with goo.  It was 3:30am when we were finished at the ER.  My husband and I were exhausted and decided to go to our apartment to sleep until morning when we could travel safer.

We got to our wonderful suite late the next day.  We had to spend most of our time in the room. I am allergic to all pain medications and so on top of it all, I needed to keep my foot elevated and iced as often as I could to keep on top of the pain.  Another funny addition is that we had just graduated college and really couldn’t afford much so we had made plans to spend the second part of our honeymoon camping with my husbands family where I still couldn’t participate in the activities. 

All in all, the wedding was wonderful, the pictures were beautiful, the reception rocked, our honey moon was cut short by a day and a half, and my toe nail fell completely off the third day after it happened. This whole situation makes for one of the best stories I have had the privilege of telling (repeatedly of course).  I’m actually not sure that I would have changed any of it, though my toe nail has never been the same.

I have attached a family picture taken this year at Christmas time with our little boy.  As you can see, my husband is not a small man, there was a lot of force behind the shutting of the door each time he “slammed” it on my toe.  Seriously funny stuff.

I hope you enjoy our story, have a wonderful day!

Family Photo1


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